Is it possible to be so socially exhausted even if I haven’t been interacting with people much?
My introvertion has reached an all-time high.
I haven’t been spending time with people aside from Artie, my family and a few select friends.
I’ve met a few people here and there when I attend blog events but I’ve never really bonded with anyone new or thought of anyone who I can consider a ‘friend’.
Most are usually still at the level of ‘acquaintance’.
At most, I can categorize them as my ‘Facebook/twitter/instagram Friend’.
Friendship is something I’ve never craved for, unlike some people who are always seem to be in search of people who will accept them, like them and love them.
I was always happy to be alone, with my nose in a book, or be in front of my computer the whole day.
I never had the urge to be around people.
Don’t get me wrong, though. I have friends and (I think) I know how to connect with people.
But it takes a special kind of someone for me to open up to and actually be comfortable around with.
Lately, I haven’t found someone like that.
I don’t know when this all started.
When did I start becoming so distrustful of people?
Even people who I used to consider as friends don’t really feel like they’re my friends anymore.
I suppose it’s inevitable because people do change over time. And right now, I feel like I have nothing in common with people I once considered my soulmates.
It has come to the point that sometimes, I feel that these friends are now being judgemental just because we’re not on the same page of the Book of Life.
At the same time, I’ve met new people who I can relate to more, but nothing close to someone who I can bare my innermost feelings.
When you see people gossip and hear people talk about others behind their backs all the time, it just makes you re-evaluate your relationships.
It’s just everywhere. On Facebook, on Twitter, on Whatsapp/Viber/LINE chats.
I don’t even need to go out of my house and I see people backstabbing people everywhere.
I don’t claim to be a saint, though. I have had my own share of gossiping.
But others are just so extreme. I can’t even explain it in words.
It’s like some people live to gossip. To talk about people and their (un)fortunate circumstances.
And this is why I prefer to be around cats. Not dogs, but cats.
Cats don’t crave for attention. They tell you when they want to eat, then they leave you alone.
But then they surprise you with those rare moments when they just suddenly want to hang out with you for no reason at all.
No expectations, no pressure.
No negativity, no gossip.
No hate. Just comfortable silence.
I’ve had it with people and their agendas.
*sinks lower into introvert land*